A sharp beep beep beep beep pierces through the silence of the room, reverberating off the studios walls and disturbing the serenity of svasana. UGHHHH I think to myself as my hand instinctively moves towards my stomach to cover the 3-inch circle of plastic adhered to the soft flesh on my right side. My face flushes red as I attempt to smother the repeat alarm that will go off in exactly 120 seconds, as well as any rogue beeps that might sneak out before then. I count silently while trying to take stock of the room’s reactions without lifting my head off the mat. Are people looking around in order to locate the source of this intrusion into their meditative state? Have I ruined everyone’s yoga bliss? Is there a Sanskrit word so-sorry-please-dont-hate-me?

For over a decade, I have been practicing yoga in the different places that I have lived and traveled. Any time I relocated, I would search for a studio or two that I could use to settle back into my practice and find community.

In 2017, I moved to Cape Ann and started attending some local yoga classes twice a week.

I recently learned a tough lesson on self-care. As a yoga teacher, I constantly preached from the front of the class about self-care because I knew in my heart it was true. However, I secretly continued to put myself last again and again. Every time I would talk about self-care, I would get a pit in my stomach because I knew I wasn’t living that way. The priorities I put in front of myself were really, really important like my children, my family, my household, my students, and, of course, Treetop Yoga Studio, so I would always justify not taking the time for me.

Since my divorce six years ago, I’ve been cutting out the chaos in my life by erasing the drama in any given situation and focusing on the truth.   I work hard to clear away the internal chatter that fuels an erratic response based on assumptions and my own insecurities.  It’s a daily practice and it hasn’t been easy to retrain my mind.  But, the payoff has been huge: I have less anxiety, less anger, more explanations and insight to who I am and why, and ultimately more peace.

Sunday February 11th  was the end of my unlimited yoga package at Treetop Yoga in Gloucester and was also my 123rd  day as a Treetop Yoga member. That evening I took my 123rd Yoga class there and it was Hilary Yin Flow class, which I humbly and lovingly refer to as a Cosmic Restore class. One doesn’t just participate in a Hilary class, you experience it. Just surrender. Start your weekend with Jamie  “Cardio for the Soul” Saturday morning flow class, end it with Hilary’s Yin, and you’ve got a powerful set of Yoga bookends!

As a yoga teacher, your students will be looking to you to show them the way to natural health; how to be the “living remedy” and how to practice the art of yoga safely; how to implement a life of moderation,

fulfillment and activism, to feel you can give of your generous spirit and attract those things that will support you without getting depleted or sacrificing yourself in the process.

I began my yoga journey nearly 10 years ago. I grew up dancing and cheering, never competitively, and it stopped gradually once I entered high school (and discovered boys and live music). Despite being dubbed “Sloth” by my older brother as a child, I have always loved movement (however slow it was). I could whip out a tripod headstand from a very young age. My flat little head made the perfect base to turn me into a human spinning machine. I’d pop up, straddle my legs and around I would go, walking my hands a full 360, sometimes two. It made my dance teachers and cheer coaches happy- I have VHS proof of being front and center, spinning away. But this blog post won’t be about my full yoga journey, or my odd set of skills. Be patient.

I was running a little late to Treetop Yoga, and in the interest of saving a minute, and for the first time ever, I made the move of entering the side door by the Well and up the stairs, vs the main lobby area. Rest & Restore was upstairs of course, so I went straight up, and into the room, laid out my mat, and went for blocks, blankets, & bolsters. I noticed no one around me had bolsters or blankets, and thought I was probably just ahead of the game, or maybe these other folks are new.   The instructor wasn’t someone I was familiar with yet, it’s not uncommon to have substitutions.